Here is the first clip of the MTV True Life episode that my son as on. Even though he is having a few problems with the VA right now on getting him into MMI in Phoenix, and has his moments of depression, it is not as bad as it was a year ago. I am so very proud of him and the progress he has made in overcoming PTSD.
The episode just aired. I scarred as I was that it would not turn out to be what my son hoped it would, I am happy to say, that for his segment at least, it was. I called him as soon as it was over and asked him what he thought of it and if it got across what he wanted to say and show. He said it was good and yes it did. We both agree that we are glad that it showed 3 different stages of recovery. Each of them have a long way to go, but at least they all have asked for help….. That is the first and hardest step to make.
Adam, my best wishes to you in your project to find another way of treating PTSD. I too, agree that the Doctors are to quick to prescribe drugs. And many times those drugs don’t work. I would love to help promote what you are doing. You should be very proud of yourself. I know I am proud you!
Arther, Man don’t let the crap get ya down. You are strong and will over come this! I wish you the best of luck in getting treatment.
Kenny, my dear son, I am so very proud of you! You have come a very long way since I picked you up in Texas last February. You are getting better every day and yes, you do have a very long life ahead of you. And I know it will be a great one.
So, now everyone else, tell us what you think! Did “True Life” do a good job? Do you have a better incite of what PTSD is and how it affects our returning Troops?
UPDATE: The show will air Saturday, December 6th at 1700 CT (5pm)
Over the last few months, MTV’s show “True Life” has followed my oldest son, Kenny, around from time to time. They are doing a show on soldiers coming back from Iraq with PTSD. When MTV left a message on my blog months ago asking for help in contacting soldiers with PTSD, I was a bit nervous. Kenny was living with me at the time and making progress in healing from his PTSD. After his being suicidal back in February and my knowing what I know about PTSD, I wasn’t sure I wanted him contacting the show. But, he is a grown man and I have to let his make his own decisions about things like this. After MANY hours talking about this, Kenny decided to call them. He was making progress and actually having a good experience with the Biloxi VA. As we talked he expressed his desire to show other soldiers that you can learn to deal with it, that you can get better. He wanted to give them some hope and maybe help point them in the right direction. How could I argue with that reasoning? I, myself, have put myself out there to show others that you can overcome and heal from the bad things that happen to you in your life. It’s about deciding that you are a survivor instead of a victim.
So, after having a camera in my house for several days and them following Kenny back to Arkansas and months of filming, the segment is going to air next Saturday, December 6th. The show will spotlight two soldiers that are still struggling with their PTSD and Kenny as the success story. I don’t know the exact time the show will air, but Craig, the producer and person that followed my son, says he will call me and let me know the exact time later this week. When I get that call, I will let ya’ll know. I do hope that ya’ll will watch the episode and that his story is told as he wishes it to be.
side note: Thank you Craig for the get well package! It was very kind and thoughtful of you!
Rodney and Mary, my little sister, gotmarried this past weekend in Ft Myers, FL. She was a beautifulbride and I have to say he was a hansom groom.
BUT…
The party started way before the wedding ended, a couple of days before. Mary and Rodney are members of the Hash House Harriers. So when I arrived on my motorcycle at 0030 Friday morning, I was met by Rodney holding a bottle of Rum. We chatted about my ride down, bikes, my sister, and the wedding. Then I went to my room and changed into some shorts and met the others by the pool. Course with there being a lot of Hasher’s there, shorts was not good enough and I had to go back and put on my swim suit.
There was alot of stories told as I learned the Hasher names of my sister’sfriends and they learned about me. There was beer tossed from the balcony to the pool, rum drank, swimming in the Gulf, and a lot of joking around. Of course the night ended as few hours later and the next started just a few hours later. We all did breakfast/lunch together and hit the beach again.
We played onthe beach and in the pool all afternoon till time to get ready forthe Wedding Rehearsal, but the jokes and horsing around didn’t.
Then thepartying started again. We hit several bars found another brideand groom and did a lot of celebrating!!
Pleaseforgive me for that last picture, I couldn’t resist taking a pictureof my sister and Bobby doing this dorky dance. We all laughed at them out on the floor. We did a pup crawl, but I think we all agreed that the Beached Whale was the best. (We went back there several times.)
After hitting the bars, we went back to The Edison Beach House, changed into our swim suites, drank and partied some more.
Sometime early the next morning we all went to bed and tried to getsome sleep before the big even later that day. But we couldn’t let the whole day go by without doing a hash. Someone laid trail and we followed….drinking, joking, and having fun all the way.
Once wegot to the last pup, The Beached Whale, we chugged as few. Ofcourse, since this was my first hash, I was considered a virgin and had to chug a beer.
There was lots ofchugging going on. BUT, as sister to the bride, I was underorders to make sure the groom and groomsmen didn’t get ”trashed”! The job was easy. Rodney, John, and Bobby behaved themselves very well. But they did have to chug a few. They couldn’t miss out on all the fun!
Then iscame time to head back and get ready for thewedding.
I have tosay, My sister was a VERY beautiful bride and I don’t thinkanyone could have asked for a more perfect wedding. The weather was perfect, not to hot, not to much wind, and the sunset was a perfect background!
Then came time to the reception at Charlie’s BoatHouse. The food and drink was great! One of Mary’s hasher friends was the DJ. They cut the cake, and then we danced.
I am veryhappy for Rodney and Mary and wish them all the best. If thisweekend and the wedding are any indication of the life these two are going to have together….. it is going to be one of the great ones!
I love you Sis!
And Rodney..welcome to the family, we love you too!
My son is doing better and going to the VA in Biloxi, MS. But it took his getting to a very scary place for both him and my family to get to where we are now. He is going to the VA at least once a week and meeting with a PTSD group and they have him on medication. Even though I am happy and relieved to say that at this point he is no longer suicidal, he still has some very bad days.
There are several issues that I want to address and hope to be able to over time, but for now. I want to bring to you attention the issue of suicide. Suicide among our returning Iraq and Afghanistan Veterans is on the rise. Back in late 2007, to ensure veterans with emotional crises have round-the-clock access to trained professionals, the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) began operation of a national suicide prevention hotline for veterans. Veterans can call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) and press “1″ to reach the VA hotline, which will be staffed by mental health professionals in Canandaigua, N.Y. who will work closely with local VA mental health providers to help callers.
Back in late 2007, about month after the start of the new hotline. VA Watchdog dot org reported that 4,500 people had already called the hotline. Of those, 100 were admitted to Va Hospitals. I couldn’t fine any number on how many received outpatient help, like my son. But they do report at that time, some 50,000 troops were retuning from the War/Combat zones with some type of combat related mental health stress.
Suicide is the 11th most frequent cause of death in the US: someone dies from suicide every 16 minutes. Suicidal ideas and attempts to harm oneself are the result of problems that may seem like they can’t be fixed. Get help if you notice any of the following:
Talking about wanting to hurt or kill oneself
Trying to get pills, guns, or other ways to harm oneself
Talking or writing about death, dying, or suicide
Hopelessness
Rage, uncontrolled anger, seeking revenge
Acting in a reckless or risky way
Feeling trapped, like there’s no way out
Saying or feeling there’s no reason for living
The newest patients to the VA have been returning combat soldiers, men and women who served in Operations Enduring Freedom and Iraqi Freedom. (OEF/OIF). In a recent study, Dr. Karen Seal and colleagues at the San Francisco Veterans Affairs Medical Center and USC, reviewed records for over 100,000 veterans, who separated from active duty between 2001-2005 and sought care from VA medical facilities. The most common combination of diagnoses found was post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and depression. Young soldiers were three times as likely as those over 40 to be diagnosed with PTSD and/or another mental health disorder. Most mental health problems were first identified during visits with primary care doctors, not with mental health professionals. Here is a Suicide Prevention Letter from the Under Secretary of Health.
I would like to welcome and introduce you to a new author on my blog, my son, Kenny aka Sniper Check. Kenny joined the Arkansas National Guard between his junior and senior years of high school. He graduated his AIT at Ft Knox, in September 2004. A few months later he found himself joining his unit in Iraq.
He served 3 months with E Troop, 151 Cav., of the 39th Infantry Brigade in Iraq. He could have come home when they did in March 2005, but volunteered to stay. “It just doesn’t make sense to only stay 3 months, mom.” he said when he told me about his decision. He then was attached to the 256th Infantry out of Louisana, who then attached him to E Troop, 101 Cav., which was an attachement from New York.
He came home in September 2005. After several months home, he decided to go regular Army and went to Ft Hood and was with I Troop, 3rd Squardron, 3d ACR. While preparing to return ot Iraq, his symptoms of PTSD worsened and he was discharged in October 2007.
I am very proud of Kenny and want to welcome his input on this blog. He is going through the VA in Biloxi, MS to help for his PTSD. As he makes progress and deal with the lose of his buddies in Iraq he will be sharing his thoughts and feelings on Military life, dealing with PTSD and the VA, and how life goes on after the Army.
thanks you son for being willing to share your life with me and others, so that we may better understand what all our Troops are dealing with. I love you!
I hate to bring to much of my personal business here, but I am in need to your supporting thoughts and prayers right now for my oldest son. He is former Army and an Iraq War Vet. He is going though some very trying times right now and if things go as I hope, will be admitted to the VA hospital tomorrow. I wont go into it all right now…. I simply can’t. I just ask that you give what positive support and prayers that you can.
UPDATE
We made it through the night and are waiting form someone from the VA to come pick us up. I guess they don’t want my bobtail down there or think I can’t park it there. One thing I know for sure, I am going with him! I am in hopes that if they admit him I can take him back to Mississippi to the VA Hospital there to do it. At least he will have family around there. right now I just do not know.
I do have another request. Does anyone know what the policy’s of the VA’s Suicide hotline are? Why would they want you to wait 24 hours for someone to call you back? I am very angry at this! Just because you have friends around does not mean that nothing will happen!
Kid say the darnedest things…..no matter what their age.
As many of ya’ll know, 2 of my boys and 1 daughter-in-law have come to live with me for a bit while they find jobs and get on their feet. My oldest starts truck driving school on Monday, but that is another post I will write later. Anyway, being a single, healthy, red-blooded American female of the young age of 42, 43 in March, I am dating. Not much, but I am dating. With my kids having lived with their Dad for so many years while I have been driving a truck across our great country, they have not seen the day to day going ons in my life. They get bits and pieces, but not the really immersed stuff.
I don’t date much, a hazard of being a truck driver, and when I do, I have gotten to be very picky. Remember, I was married to two abusive men, of which one tried to kill me. So, I have a certain criteria that they have to meet. I have to say that several have gotten a first date, a few of them have gotten a second date, even fewer have gotten a third date, I think only one has gotten a fourth date, and none have gotten a fifth date. Too picky…..maybe, but I don’t think so. I just know what I want and what I don’t want.
Anyway, New Years Eve I was supposed to have a date with a guy that I call friend and have known for a while. A couple of days before, he backs out on the date. He had good reasons, and I understand, but I was still very disappointed. Then a couple of truck driver friends were supposed to be passing through my area and I was going to meet up with them. Just a friend thing, nothing more. But as crazy as the truck driving life is, things went wrong and they didn’t make it. One’s truck broke down, one cut his hand open to the bone putting train horns on his rig, and the other had to swap with another driver and go the other way. A death in the family, and my friend said he would swap loads so the guy could get home.
Then I got a call New Years Eve afternoon from the trucker friend that cut his hand and lives over in Louisiana. He went to the doctor and was now loading up his tanker and would be headed to the Carolina’s. He asked if I was still going to meet the rest of the guys. I told him what was going on with all of them and he asked if he could take me to dinner. Well, I told him that I had promised my boys and daughter-in-law that I would make my famous spaghetti, but he was welcome to join us. He was happy to hear that he could get a good home cooked meal and jumped on the offer.
A few hours later, after dark, he pulled his rig into my yard. YES! I have my drive set up so that I can park my rig in my yard. Heck, I can get a couple of rigs in the yard. Out of 5 acers between me, my Dad and my brother, he stops in the ONE place he could get stuck. When the water company put in my water meter a few weeks ago, there was a leak and it took them several days to get back out here to fix it. I have been all over this yard with my flatbed, it loaded heavy, and even in the rain. But with all that water sitting in one spot for several days, that little area was a bit softer than normal. Bayou Boy, that is his handle, thought I was saying “whoa” when I was saying “go” and stopped where all that water had been sitting for days. The tires start spinning and in the dark, I told him to just leave it, he could sleep on the couch and we would deal with it in the morning.
I cooked dinner and we all had a great time wishing in the new year. The next morning we got his truck un-stuck and he was on his way. But this brought up a little talk between me and my boys about men, dating and sex. Oh yes, sex. Not a topic I really want to talk about with my grown boys. We all know it happens, but there are just lines there that a parent has a hard time talking about with their kids. Besides, it is one thing to talk to your kids about sex in their life, but something totally different when they want to talk to you about yours.
They knew Bayou Boy slept on the couch, heck, one of my boys is sleeping on the other. But for a few moments, I felt like I was the kid and they the parents. I know my boys are very protective of me and have always been so. Unfortunately, they saw a little of the abuse I went through and that affects them and how they see the men around me. Course, with my being a woman in a man’s world driving a truck, 99% of my friends are men. For the most part, I am one of the guys while on the job. This is something my boys are not use to. For any other women out there doing jobs that most would consider to be a mans job, I know you understand where I am coming from. For you others, well, you will just have to open your mind to the fact that men and women CAN be friends and there be nothing else going on. If you can’t do that, I am sorry. You are missing out on some great friendships.
Anyway, we are talking and I am trying to hold that line of what is OK and not OK to tell your kids about your sex life. Harder to do when they are grown, one is married and expecting a baby. Then as I should have expected, my youngest, Steffan, becomes the comedian. Now think about this. I don’t care how old you are, the thought of your parents having sex is a foreign idea to you and some may even think it is “gross”. But the fact of the matter is, it happens. We are all human and all have human needs. Some of us do without for longer periods than those that are married, but it still happens, once in a while.
Anyway, Steffan all of the sudden pops, off “GROSS!”. I had not said anything out of line or inappropriate, but I think it finally dawned on him what he was asking me.
He said, ” Mom, your my mom! You can’t do that!”
I was stunned. I said, “Son, I am not dead!”
He said, “Parents are not supposed to do that.”
I asked him, “How do you think you and your brothers got here?”
He said, “The stork brought us and you come from the planet of ‘Mom & Dad’.”
Needless to say, I fell out laughing!!!
I am proud to announce that on December 15th, my son, Steffan married a lovely young lady, Amber, in Helena, AR.
The wedding was great! The bride was beautiful and the groom VERY hansom. Course I am the proud mom of the groom, so my opinion may be a bit prejudice.
For those of you that know my son, you know what kind of a comedian he can be. For those that dont…he is always pulling or saying something. So after the cutting of the cake, my dear son decided that it was time to eat it.
We reminded him that they needed to make the toast.
And once again, my son has everyone laughing. He drank all his drink and then poured Amber’s into his glass and drank it as well.
All in all, it was a lovely wedding. Now the kids are living with me for a while here in Mississippi while they look for jobs and get started on their new life together.
